Whenever you feel like perhaps you didn’t get exactly what you deserved from life, you might just need to think twice and see opportunity where there was lack. So here it goes then: we’re only at the first Sziget 2017 announcement, and I can already venture into two of my favourite line up related activties. First on the list is going berserk over the Final Main Stage Knob Fiddler- FMSKF for convenience from now on.

Come to think of it, this moment might be the one where instead of spilling my bile here I should go to the closest store which begins with a vowel which is not a, e, o or u, purchase an item the name of which elegantly includes the same vowel, fire it up, co-opt a few bored friends, start an electro thump act called FMSKF and headline Sziget in a couple of years or so. Maybe we can even fake our CVs and pretend to be Dutch, or, even better, find an actual Dutch person to join in the fun, for some extra knob fiddler cred.

Though apparently, judging by next year’s FMSKF, Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike it’s enough to be Belgian too, so we can excitedly await the plague spreading to Luxembourg every day now. I actually valiantly tried to listen to one of their songs, but in the tenth second very vile thoughts and feelings overcame me, and I hurriedly switched to Sziget’s Youtube channel, where you can now indulge in this summer’s entire and entirely stupendous Editors gig. Plus Bloc Party’s concert too, once you have fully calmed down and became one with the forces of good in the universe.

The equilibrium of being is of course a delicate thing, and every now and then Major Lazer rolls into in a giant plastic ball of egotism and stolen beats. Yes, we have now reached my second much loved activity: going berserk over Diplo in most of his guises, but particularly in that of Major Lazer. Admittedly, I can listen to Major Lazer, and there might be the odd track which I almost enjoy during window cleaning- actually, I never ever clean windows, but If I did, maybe Lean On would go nicely with it, especially since it’s better than leaning out and falling over into the street below. My real problem is that he keeps reiterating the same recipe, with most ingredients unceremoniously pilfered from a host of sources, over and over again, and people get excited as over a second, third, sixth, umpteenth coming of the big nothing.

But surely many will be delighted to have him back, as a headliner no less, and until then we can take refuge in A38. The tent’s programme has also welcomed its first names: DJ Shadow being a piece of history is a must watch, even if a little past his prime and relevance now and with Mac DeMarco I can wash myself clean of the sin of somehow missing this summer’s sold out Akvárium gig. This in spite of the fact that I still can’t get Mac DeMarco, but as once I went from not getting ALT-J to only listening to ALT-J I have now learned that sometimes good music grows on you when you least expect it. Oh Wonder’s Without You infiltrated itself into my playlist at one point, because Youtube, being wiser than you and I, considered that I might as well like it, and I actually did. I then wondered a lot whether lead singer Josephine Vander Gucht’s name is misspelled or not.  GusGus is another band whose club gigs I regularly miss, so this far this seems to be a Sziget of atonement for me. Also in A38 you can check out Bad Religion, because I won’t, Kensington, who are Dutch and play some sort of music I can’t put my finger on, nor do I really want to and Vince Staples and GTA, who have been place on my Sziget guinea-pigging list.

Besides FMSKF and Major Lazer, Tom Odell and Two Door Cinema Club are also coming to the Main Stage, the latter bringing the soothing realization that even after the sad demise of the The Maccabees there are still completely average indie acts out there fighting for the survival of both averageness and indie. Though now that I just googled them more attentively and discovered that they hail form Bangor, Nothern Ireland as opposed to Bangor, Wales I feel a tad better about them- which is not to say I have anything against the Welsh but I predictably do have a crush or two on the Irish. Tom Odell has one good song- that’s what I said about Passenger as well last year, and he proved a blast, so why not give the man a chance. About the acts in the Arena it’s perhaps better to be quiet, as they will most likely be loud as hell when they do show up, but I will leave you with their names (Oliver Heldens and W&W) and some atmospheric Sziget shots of yore to warm your wintry hearts while stay tuned for the next line up announcement.